ONE SIDED DIALOUGE.....

Matthew 7:7
 Ask and it will be giving unto you; Seek and you shall find; Knock and the door will be open unto you.

Dear God,
I’m coming to you, because my will for your will is making my stomach ill. My musical heart is not singing the right notes. My poetic words are getting stuck in my throat. My Emotions are running amuck. I can't seem to get unstuck. I know that you have never left my side. But this place I’m in is starting to feel like a rolling tide. I seek your face. Pray for your loving grace. I dedicate everything in my being to you. You see that my heart is pure. I love as you have taught me to love. Loving you unconditional I have been true. When you asked me to marry you. I said I do. Novemeber 12, 2002 was the date. My mom and Dad were even present to give me away. I vowed that I would never love anything more than you. You vowed that you would always help me thru any obstacle course that I must do. I vowed that I would always give you my best. Making sure I stand out above the rest. I vowed that I will always be one of the brightest stars in the sky. You vowed that if I would only believe in your cause and know that you have control of it all. All of my enemies will fall and be a foot stool so I can stand tall. Despite all of the drama I may bring. You vowed that my angels will always sing. Releasing angels of  protection on my account. Ensuring that my delicate heart and compelling soul would be protected thru out...

 I’m putting everything I have in your spiritual bowl.  I want you to mix and  reshape my mold. I have faith knowing you will make me whole.  I have the permission to ask and expect to receive my blessings. I’m asking for a physical being with all the perfect qualities that fits me best. The one that you know will stand out from the rest. I'm asking that you touch their personal cause with those powerful hands. So, we can stand side by side to defeat Satan's plans. I'm asking for your spiritual truth.  I'm asking that you pour out your power and fill our foundation with all your loving might. That should keep us from losing sight.  I’m asking for joy to come in the mist of any pain. I’m asking that they see my worth even if I can’t express or explain.

You said “what's yours is mine.” I said “what's mine is yours.” You told me” it's ok to go thru my personal things.” You said” whatever I seek, you wanted me to find.” It felt funny going thru your phone. Going thru the call and text log I was afraid of it all. I then discovered that you did nothing wrong. As I keep reading thru your intimate details you had with so many.  I observed thru it all you loved them as best as you could. Some left you because they misunderstood what you were really about. I immediately wanted to get straight hood and Box them out. But you told me to hold my Peace and stay in my place. Keep on reading I’m not out of the race. I stayed focused on the rest of the text you had with Eve, Sarah, Ruth, Hannah, Esther and Mary. I even read about the prostitutes that was taking loot. I didn't even want to give you the boot. Then you asked in my seeking what did I find?  In spite of all the Women you have ever loved. You have always kept your word and guided them thru their personal disgrace. You showed your face at your own pace. You showed that your path is always the same, yet different on each of their personal Plains. You taught them how to love, be patient, and kind. You were gently while examine their every line. You always gave them the benefit of the doubt. I could see why they fell so deeply in love with you and couldn’t be without.

I'm Knocking on the door. So I can tell you all this and more. I may stutter a time or two. I may even experience a loss of words. But I'm going to P.U.S.H thru. Because I know I'm right for you. I pray that you hear me out no matter how long it might take. Lord Please, Oh Please Don't let this be just a ONE SIDED DIALOUGE....




Love,
Aquelle